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Tuesday, 15 July 2014

Why Does it Always Begin With C?

Waking up on Monday was difficult.  Not only did I wake up exhausted and with a headache,  but I couldn't open my right eye.  After bathing it, I realised it was weaping and was swelling.  Not only this but I was getting a couple of cold sores.  I called the doctor and got an early appointment.

Dr Ravi told me that I had conjunctivitis and was concerned that I may have Neutropenic Sepsis.  He took some blood samples and told me he would check these and call me back if there were any problems.  I was instructed to bath my eye regularly with hot water and get plenty of rest. 

In the afternoon, I stayed on the sofa watching TV with Sid and had some cuddles.  Sid cuddles really nicely when he wants too and today was a good cuddling day, just what I needed.  My eye and mouth become progressively worse over the day and we went to bed early.

Tuesday started as Monday did, but my eye was so much worse, almost at the point where I couldn't see out of it and I looked as though I had been boxing.  On top of this, my mouth was in some serious pain as my lips had swelled along with my nose with a nice covering of cold sores and I had mouth ulcers too.  I called the doctor again and I got another appointment.   This time he was shocked to see how badly the infections had taken hold so quickly.  He joked that instead of a 24 hour call back he would put me down for a 12 hour call back as I seemed to like infections.  He prescribed me antibiotics, eye drops and aciclovir (more medication).  luckily although my blood showed signs of infection, I hadn't gone neutropenic, however if it got any worse I would need to go to hospital for IV antibiotics.  I got home and sorted out my tablets and settled down to watch TV for the day.  I caught up on the TDF while drifting in and out of sleep, I had a very restful day.  My mouth was in so much pain I struggled to eat throughout the day and drank through a straw.

This was probably my lowest day so far,  not only did I feel terrible,  I was in pain, poor vision from a gammy eye and I really wanted to hide away from everyone.  People who suffer from cold sores can probably agree with me that they are not pleasant.  They hurt, really hurt.  Combine these with a swollen and weaping eye and mouth ulcers - this is not my prettiest day.

Wednesday was much the same but I managed to have a bath.  I don't have any energy or motivation to do anything.  I rarely get dressed.  I've barely been able to eat and live off Ensure drinks, milk and blackcurrant juice - this week so far has been hard and it has nothing to do with having no stomach or cancer.

The best bit of this week is the help I have had from my mum and John, they have both been great.  Along with Leonie, she always has a way of putting things into perspective and bringing me back to reality.

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